Scientists brew low-calorie stout: This just doesn’t sound right to me. They claim it "has the same consistency, taste and texture as its full-bodied equivalent," but I just can’t believe that. Read on:

Normal stout has about 2g of carbohydrate and contains 32 calories per 100ml while the new version has 0.6g of carbs and 24 calories per 100ml.

Elke Arendt, a lecturer in food technology who is leading the research, said: "We modified the mashing procedure, which is part of the brewing process, by adding an enzyme which can degrade carbohydrate. We also modified our fermentation process to get a lower carbohydrate content by picking a specific yeast strain."

Arendt said the full-bodied taste that is typically lost by reducing carbohydrate content has been retained in the light stout. "The product has the same mouth feel — it isn’t watery, it tastes exactly like a normal stout," he said. "There are no drawbacks by reducing calories or carbohydrates."

See, when you start changing the basic chemistry of a beer, it just won’t be the same. How does this enzyme affect yeast? How does the "degraded carbohydrate" affect the beer—does it leave undigestible bits and pieces behind? Particulate matter? How does it affect the various proteins and fats that also come from the grain? Etc. etc.

Creepy. I’ll avoid it, if it ever makes it here.